Why emo-ing?

When grew up, the problem that I had is emo-ing. It conquer my life, any little thing which are not favour to me, with be a emotional factor to me. I know I had always thinking too much for many things. Thinking a lot of reason and excuse for my past behaviour. I know this is truly bad, but I have no way to conquer it back, I always tend to think worstly and result in emo-ing.

         What always your emotional factors? What are my emotional factors? I thought I have some of the factors as follow:
1. Is it without a person to help you get off your's chest?
2. Tend to be jealousy
3. Always disatisfied with others
4. Shying away
5. Not enough sleep?

       I would very happy if someone who like to let me unload. But I would not like to unload to others since I found that my care always from my villian inside. I know that I been influence by the bad habit, however, I still can't counter with it, if I find someone to output myself, It will be a shame for myself indeed. Then, I started understand that why people like to write diary or anything else. Because, it really a place to unload yourself with no reply or comment from the diary. If people would like to see your blog, I will not hiding it too since I hope someone can hear to me too. Haha.. If you are not feeling that blog or diary would be a place to unload yourself, thats mean your mind haven't full enough and scare enough to spell out your thought.
    
       Jealous - Would be my biggest problem. I have this since I was young and I thought that I have it severely. I'm not so kind compare to others, but I have a bad thought compare to others. I scare people critic on me but I like to critics others. I jealous to the people having high profile, I hate people doing things to make them high profile, but if possible I would like myself to be high profile. What's wrong with me???!!! Who can save me and clean my mind to be pure and moderate, I would not like this cause this make me suffer. My suffer always come when I felt contradiction within my dirty thought and civilisation thought.
          Emotional - mainly cause by not enough sleep for me I think. When I was having a bad sleeping night, everything will come into bad situation, happy things will bcome a very bad things when it pass through your mind. When I was in mood, everything would be good things, eventhought a bad things, I would like to lend my hand to help to become good things. How terrible is my mind?

         Lastly, one more thing that I suspected, all the reason above is come from my too free or lazy to do things instead? Then starting to thought with a lot of unhappyness and damn fucking thought. If that so, I am silly enough, what is the remedy to cure my lazy and free time? Haiz.....